There is a paradox in Pride. Pride is one of the seven deadly sins and the sin from which all others arise. But pride can also apply to our nation, your family, your work your favorite sports team, your children or yourself. We think of pride as taking pride in a job well done, setting a goal and accomplishing it, watching our children grow and mature. “Pride refers to a strong sense of self-respect, a refusal to be humiliated as well as joy in the accomplishments of oneself or a person, or group with which one identifies.” When you work hard and do a great job and take pride in your efforts you are filled with self-respect for what you have accomplished. When I see my boys mature and make better choices I am filled with pride in how they are becoming fine young men. But pride can also have a much deeper level. When my mother was dying from cancer, after a 7-year remission, I came home from seminary early to care for her. We took a family trip up to Big Sur on the coast of Northern California and we celebrated the time we had. When the day finally came for her to be with God, we had all said our good-byes and our I love you’s. One of the last things I said to her, “I will make you proud of me.” I often think of the joy my life would bring to her. I try to live my life faithful to that promise. Pride can be a wonderful motivator and way to respect yourself or another in a very personal way.
Yet another element, the refusal to be humiliated, is one that can lead to a very different reality, the paradoxical reality. Now of course no one likes to be humiliated, have their ego destroyed or their pride injured. But that is just what had happened to the disciples. In the preceding passage, the disciples fail to heal a boy plagued with seizures. The boy’s father has brought him to the disciples, but they not only fell short of the task, but then Jesus declares them part of a “faithless generation” implying their prayers are insufficient. That might have made them feel a bit humiliated.
Jesus creates alone time with his disciples so that he can prepare them for what is about to happen, help them to understand his eminent betrayal, death and resurrection. Imagine hearing that the most important person in your life is going to be killed. Now imagine that he says he will rise again. Confusing and unbelievable. Yet this is the second time Jesus has told the disciples about his death and resurrection, yet they still do not understand. And they were also too afraid to ask him about it. But I bet that even if they could not grasp that knowledge intellectually they understood on an emotional level. When Jesus said he was about to be killed, at some level the fear took hold, the pride asserted itself and they needed to protect, to puff up, to assert value into their life because they were afraid. They might have been afraid of other things too; afraid of Jesus dying, afraid of failing in their work, and of not being good enough to do what is asked. Their fear leads to their pride, sparking the disciples to argue about who is the greatest.
Today we might ask who has the greatest house, who has the greatest family, who has the greatest job, prestige, or lineage, maybe even the greatest country. Getting side-tracked on the who is the greatest argument will only lead to the same downfall as the disciples. They were so focused on “the greatest question” they missed out on Jesus’ life transforming teaching. Jesus was explaining the foundation of our salvation and his approaching victory over death, but the disciples checked out, focused on ego building talk. Thomas Merton, a Trappist monk, theologian said, “Pride makes you artificial and humility makes you real.” Yet pride can be deceptive and subtle.
I want to share with you a time when my pride got in the way. I was working in a church part time, I had recently separated from my husband and I started anew part-time job. I was hoping these two jobs could go together as I was trying to support my family. When I explained to them my situation, they said they needed someone who could be there more often, this was after three years on the job. So they let me go. I had put my heart and soul into that church and I felt slighted. I thought about how easily I could be replaced. But once I saw this feeling as pride, I could step back and say, this is exactly what needs to happen for the church to thrive. It is not about me, it is about finding a new way and new leaders for doing God’s work. I share this with you to ask the question what do you miss in life because you are focused on how things effect you, your pride, or yourself?
Baruch Spinoza a 16th century Dutch philosopher and theologian said, “The greatest pride, or the greatest despondency is the greatest ignorance of one’s self.”
The disciples’ prideful discussion about who is the greatest helps them to avoid the real issue, losing their Lord. We too can get overwhelmed by our feelings, want to avoid, redirect, find something to ease the fear. This false pride, the pride that is not so much in a job well done, but one that alleviates fear masks our own understanding of ourselves. This kind of pride is essentially competitive and excessive belief in one’s own abilities. It interferes with one’s recognition of the grace of God, or the worth which God sees in us and in others.
James reminds us that selfish ambition, or pride, is earthly, unspiritual and definitely not of God. For pride separates us from God. Pride is really the full expression of the ego, or of the self. One way to think about EGO is that it stands for Easing God Out. When pride takes hold there is no room left for God we Ease God Out of our lives. James continues, “God opposes the proud and gives grace to the humble.” Hubris, or excessive pride, is the pride that God opposes. We as Christians are called, not to pride, but to the humble wisdom from above that is pure, peaceable, gentle, open to reason and full of mercy. Christ lived this humble wisdom. H. Richard Niebuhr wrote, “The humility of Christ is not the moderation of keeping one’s exact place in the scale of being, but rather that of absolute dependence on God and absolute trust in him, with the consequent ability to move mountains. The secret of the meekness and the gentleness of Christ lies in his relation to God.” Submitting to God allows us to humbly draw near to God, so that God will draw near to us.
Jesus teaches us how to draw near to God with the help of a child. An unhealed child was the initial source of humiliation for the disciples and now another child is the example of humble servanthood. Jesus said, “If anyone would be first, he must be last of all, the servants of all.” This is Christ’s recipe for humility. Jesus reverses the rules and flips the disciples’ expectations on their heads. Taking a child, the most vulnerable, silenced, and disenfranchised member of society, into the center Jesus is placing him in this radical place of honor. It is not the child’s innocence or trustfulness that is highlighted here, but the child’s lowly status. A child is always under the authority of another, without rights. We are to serve one another just as Christ served this child. We are to welcome the vulnerable and embrace the silenced. For in the community of God’s sovereign realm, no one finds themselves left by Jesus outside the picture window, pressing nose against the glass to peer in and see what it might be like “if only.” We are all included: all are servants and we are to serve all. This is how we become great in the eyes of God.
Martin Luther King, Jr. once preached, “This is your new definition of greatness… It means that everybody can be great. Because everybody can serve. You don’t have to have a college degree to serve. You don’t have to know the second theory of thermodynamics in physics to serve. You only need a heart full of grace. A soul generated by love… And you can serve.” – Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. “The Drum Major Instinct”
Our greatness is not found in our prideful accomplishment. Our greatness is in our service. Jesus said, “Whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me, and whoever welcomes me, welcomes not me but the one who sent me.” A chain relationship is forged. A fellowship of hospitality is established between the little child, Jesus, us and God. We are a part of that fellowship as we serve.
My prayer is that we have this attitude of service and create a church of welcome and hospitality. As we minister to each other, pray for each other and reach out to our neighbors let us be mindful of this fellowship of hospitality. Let us welcome everyone who walks through Christ’s doors as we would welcome Christ himself. Let us invite our friends to share in the fellowship of hospitality created by Christ. Especially invite them nest week to the church picnic. For when we serve in this way, we welcome God, become the hands and feet of Christ and humbly walk with our God and our neighbors. AMEN
