When I came to you, brothers and sisters, I did not come proclaiming the mystery of God to you in lofty words or wisdom. 2 For I decided to know nothing among you except Jesus Christ, and him crucified. 3 And I came to you in weakness and in fear and in much trembling. 4 My speech and my proclamation were not with plausible words of wisdom, but with a demonstration of the Spirit and of power, 5 so that your faith might rest not on human wisdom but on the power of God.
6 Yet among the mature we do speak wisdom, though it is not a wisdom of this age or of the rulers of this age, who are doomed to perish. 7 But we speak God’s wisdom, secret and hidden, which God decreed before the ages for our glory. 8 None of the rulers of this age understood this; for if they had, they would not have crucified the Lord of glory. 9 But, as it is written,
“What no eye has seen, nor ear heard,
nor the human heart conceived,
what God has prepared for those who love him”—
10 these things God has revealed to us through the Spirit; for the Spirit searches everything, even the depths of God. 11 For what human being knows what is truly human except the human spirit that is within? So also no one comprehends what is truly God’s except the Spirit of God. 12 Now we have received not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit that is from God, so that we may understand the gifts bestowed on us by God. 13 And we speak of these things in words not taught by human wisdom but taught by the Spirit, interpreting spiritual things to those who are spiritual.
Before I read the scripture, I want to say I have missed you. I have missed standing in this pulpit and sharing God’s word, I have missed hugging you and I have missed being connected to your lives. Thank you for the stellar leadership of this congregation that stepped up and handled things in my absence. And most importantly, thank you for your prayers; well wishes, cards, texts, meals and visits. You supported me in ways both physical and spiritual and I am so grateful!
13 Are any among you suffering? They should pray. Are any cheerful? They should sing songs of praise. 14 Are any among you sick? They should call for the elders of the church and have them pray over them, anointing them with oil in the name of the Lord. 15 The prayer of faith will save the sick, and the Lord will raise them up; and anyone who has committed sins will be forgiven. 16 Therefore confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another, so that you may be healed. The prayer of the righteous is powerful and effective.
The passage just read came from lectionary, but this one I chose because I realized this experience gave insights into illness and healing that I want to explore that with you today. My illness was a crisis, as are the illnesses you face. Crisis in Chinese is made up of two characters, two symbols: one means danger the other means opportunity. Every time we face a crisis, we experience danger and an opportunity. I think when you feel like your life is in danger, we each have an opportunity to look for God working in our midst, finding healing wisdom. Listen now for God’s word, Read James.
It all started when I spent Thanksgiving in bed and Friday brought Urgent Care, CT scan and the doctor sending me to ER having already spoken to a surgeon. One radiologist thought abscess and the second thought possible tumor or a combination of both. The mass was the size of a racquetball. I will say my world stopped when the doctor mentioned cancer- even though there were no conclusive markers. The priorities of life shift in a moment. Advent which was just starting was no longer mine to lead. Having lost my parents young, I was fearful for my sons. (I want to say clearly I do not have cancer). I spent one night in the hospital and they sent me home with antibiotics and referred me to a surgeon. I also followed up with my GP and she encouraged me to take my temperature regularly. I was so glad she did because at 10 pm on a Friday two weeks later, still on antibiotics, I was running 102 temp. It felt like Groundhog Day being right back in the ER with the same ER surgeon, but this time they feared I might be septic. The mass had grown to baseball size, so the next day they placed a drain. I have to say having a tail is not something I like, but I am thankful it helped. Six days in the hospital on IV antibiotics. I kept asking when we could do surgery and the surgeon would have none of that. I was grateful when my surgeon called in an infectious doctor prior to releasing me. She set up daily antibiotics at the Infusion Center, continuing to treat the abscess, but making me very tired. Finally, on January 16 my appendix was removed, which we now know was the cause of the abscess.
But every time I thought we had a plan, that we settled on some information, one more test was needed. I had four CT scans and both a sigmoidoscopy and a colonoscopy in pursuit of diagnosing the origin. I had to call the surgeon on his cell phone to get the surgery date moved up two weeks. Every doctor I went to said this is not a straightforward case, we can’t find the source.
I tell this story as way of exploring some truths about healing, faith and how we move through difficult times. I wish I could tell you I was in constant prayer, but I can’t. I talked to God, but I focused on getting well, and trusted others were doing the heavy lifting in the prayer department. Thank you all so much for being my prayer team!!! But this very fact points out something Paul talked about wisdom of humans vs. the power of God. He of course was talking about faith and how we can put our trust in the wisdom of this world rather than in the power of God. I certainly do not want this to be a binary choice, both have their place. But there were times I differed to doctors’ wisdom more than God’s and I am so grateful God is gracious. Just as I am so thankful that you constantly prayed heeding James words, “Pray for one another so you may be healed” (5:16). I believe both human wisdom, expressed through medicine, and the power of God, as rallied through prayer, healed my body.
My illness also offered lessons and gifts. But those are only seen if we take the opportunity when our life is in danger to look for them. Paul wrote, “we receive the Spirit of God so we can understand the gifts God bestows on us (2:12). This he writes after having come to them “in weakness and in fear and in much trembling” (2:3). That is often how we approach medical uncertainty and diagnosis.
Lesson one, as your world gets smaller, your support gets bigger. As I was focused on my body getting well, waiting for doctors, and wondering what all of this means, more and more people supported me. Thank you for food, cards and beautiful flowers from the deacons. I know many more of you wanted to do something. A fellow pastor even brought a group to carol to me while I was in hospital. I saw it as a moment of evangelism. People I casually know were offering to bring food or drive me places. Dear friends really show up when you are sick. My friend Ann met me in urgent care and drove me to the ER and then did it again two weeks later late at night. I felt so blessed to have her medical knowledge while navigating the Emergency Room. As my world got smaller my support got bigger. For that, for you, I am grateful.
Lesson two, find ways to let people help you. Ask people to go with you to the doctor’s appointment. You never know when you will need another pair of ears. I was so thankful Lorena came with me to one. Several of you offered, thank you. Parker was naturally involved in my medical process, but I made a point of asking Cooper to bring me home from the hospital, so he could help, be part of my recovery. I got the best gift ever spending two full days with my brother while in the hospital. We chatted and read quietly. I was so grateful he was there when the surgeon spoke of cancer, when we talked to our sister together the first time in years, and the last time ever. Just being together for that long, just the two of us, was priceless.
Lesson three, patience and acceptance. Walking through medical unknowns takes a great deal of patience. I kept wondering if I had prayed for more patience because it sure seemed like God was stretching my patience muscle all the time. I wanted to have answers, to get this done, to have surgery, but that was not to be. I am sure many of you had the same thought. On the day of surgery, I had already gotten to acceptance and I found myself in an incredibly peaceful space. The surgeon was over an hour late for surgery, but rather than worry, I found my peace in singing. Tucked under the heated blanket I sang songs my mother used to sing to me, Like K<K<K> Katie and Skid-amarink-adink. It felt like she was with me. Then I sang hymns, Amazing Grace, and How Great Thou Art. But I drew the line at Swing Low, Sweet Chariot. God was with me in that little room. You’ll be happy to know I stopped singing before they wheeled me in.
Lesson four, God’s hand at work. God works all the time. The question is do we see it. I felt God’s hand at work running into my internist in the hospital as I was being taken down for a scan. I felt God’s hand at work having my surgeon call in Dr. Singh who really turned the tide with the IV antibiotics. I felt God’s hand at work when God brought Jim Bender to our congregation and we met for a collegial lunch last summer. I have been in ministry 27 years and this was the first time a colleague said, “If you ever need pulpit supply on short notice just give me a call.” So as I am driving to the ER the Friday after Thanksgiving I called Jim. As you all know he has faithfully served our congregation, preaching most of the time I was away. Thank you to Jane Odell for her leadership as well.
The healing wisdom, the four lessons I would like to offer during illness: as your world gets smaller, your support gets bigger; find ways to let people help you; patience and acceptance are your friend; look for God’s hand at work. Medical issues are certainly a time of crisis in that both danger and opportunity are present. Trust more in God’s healing power than in human wisdom, knowing both have their place in your recovery. Amen.
